Wonky Beads for Fun and Profit !

 So, you have bowls and boxes and drawers and cabinets full of Wonky Beads just sitting there, waiting to be loved and admired ? Don't wait a moment longer... Put them to work for you !

String a strand of your favorite Wonky Beads, and put them out on the fence to tell the world (or at least your immediate neighborhood) what it is you DO all day in that garage, with those big tanks you keep hauling in there. 'Fraid they're gonna be stolen by the neighborhood kids ? WHO CARES ? They're WONKY BEADS !!

Of course, if you really want to get some attention, having an Ostrich to catch people's eye sure doesn't hurt. The ostrich in the picture actually belongs to my neighbor, Cap'n Bob. He's a free ranging bird, (not unlike Cap'n Bob) but we negotiated a deal: I've made him CFO of Schermobeads.com, and he has stock options and a corner fence post, so he's a happy guy.

Wonky Beads can make you the Talk of the Neighborhood!
At least, that's what they've done for me !


(See ? He's working already!)

 Addendum for the humor impaired:
This segment of the website is intended as SATIRE and not to be taken seriously. Please do not attempt to use beads in any of the manners suggested if common sense dictates it could cause harm to people, animals or property. If you have no common sense to rely on, then just don't do it. It's probably a bad idea.
And just in case you're wondering .... No, it's not a real ostrich.
My homeowners association has rules about that sort of thing.

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